Friday, November 9, 2018

Time for Marriage or Couples Counseling?

hourglass with sand running through it

When is it time for Counseling?

Focus and Attention are required for anything and everything to flourish and grow. So checking-in with a counselor, even when things are great, is never a bad idea - it simply serves to strengthen and reaffirm your commitment to serve one another. Unfortunately, however, most people wait too long to get help. Months or years can be spent in turmoil, when a few easy counseling sessions could have mitigated the downward spiral that life has slowly slipped into.  Once the relationship breaks down and the fear of being alone sets in - we get a call.

Below are a few sure fire ways to know that your relationship could benefit from a counseling tune-up or an all out overhaul:
  • Constant negative communication, causing withdrawal or no conversation at all
  • Verbal and/or Physical abuse
  • An affair has occurred
  • Financial unfaithfulness
  • If you are just sharing space
  • Antagonistic, negative, mind games
  • Just staying together for the kids sake
  • Recurring arguments over same little things

Salvaging Your Marriage

person pours one cup of liquid into another forcing the cup to overflow
Often people feel anger and hopelessness about saving their marriage. The good news is that these feelings are great indicators to start the healing process and build solutions. When trying to salvage your marriage you need to turn the focus off your partner and place it onto yourself. Those things that made you angry - how could you better resolve them yourself? Stop being negative and instead force yourself to be positive in your conversations - patient effort and service are the keys. When you pour what's left from your cup into your partners, their cup overflows and the difference will be remarkable. When it comes to affairs, addiction and anger issues - deeper relational counseling is necessary and should be committed to as soon as possible in order to mend these fences.

The reality with relationship counseling is that it does take 3 things:
  1. an investment of time, 
  2. money, and 
  3. effort.  

Don't get caught in programs that promise quick, cheap, feel good fixes -- they Don't Last and you will find yourselves back in similar scenarios quickly.  Also, don't get caught trusting your partner if, after relational failure,  they attempt to get back into your good graces by suggesting counseling sessions  however, aren't willing to step-up and commit themselves individually to a rebuilding process.  If they don't truly recognize that they need help and are willing to make a personal investment in "me" then ultimately they are not willing to make the required investment in "us".

At TeleCounsel Group our counselors are trained to assist you in this journey and, in the midst of whatever trials you are facing, help you figure out the next steps. Call us today at 1.855.257.9444 or visit us at

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